Franchise Information

So, one day you are sitting around the house fondling your pig slut of a girlfriend, and you are thinking to yourself "I want to start my own band, but I am a talentless retard." Well, you could do what people have been doing for years and just copy the style and look of a few bands that you like, and that works for some. But if you really want to rock and fuck legions of hot young girls, then mister you want to open your own fake franchise!

For a small start up fee, you could be on your way to rock stardom. Here is what you get:
-1 4MM DAT tape of 10 FAKE Drum and sample tracks.
-1 book of FAKE bass guitar tabliture
-1 American made, Telo-Mic Box to transform any standard analog telephone into a
Microphone (Just like FAKE Chris uses)
-1 FAKE song lyric book
- Various FAKE Logo templates, flyer creation guidelines, and access to our massive
pornography archive (for flyers)
- Recognition and use of an established band name

you get all of this shipped to your door in our "Band in a Box" special, all for the low price of $1190.00. This is an unbelievable value! Email us for information on how to take advantage of this offer!